NICHOLAS STEINBACH TO BE KNOWN AS “NEW TLD NIC,” TAKE OVER THE INTERNET
Denver – Much mystery has surrounded the New TLDs and their eventual release onto the World Wide Web. In an effort to wipe away the confusion and see a clearer picture of the future of the Internet, one needs to look no further than NEW TLD NIC™.
FAQ ABOUT NEW TLD NIC
Q: Will he still be my friend?
A: Dude, really? The future of the Internet is probably more important than your feelings.
THE BABES OF NAME.COM
A three-part series on the most recent progeny of name. com employees.
This is Abigail:
After the photo shoot, we caught up with Abigail as to what it’s like being the daughter of name.com developer, Nick Salvadore.
ICN (Internal Company Newsletter): How have things been as the new kid?
Abigail: Not too badly. I was a bit gassy/grumpy right out of the gate. They called me Crabigail.
ICN: That’s pretty funny!
Abigail: (stone cold silence)
ICN: Well, I mean it’s creative. It’s a good sign that you’re parents can laugh through adversity.
Abigail: I guess. Now I just have to learn to laugh off this Colorado Rockies gear.
ICN: Baseball is fun!
Abigail: Not when you’re the Rockies in August.
ICN: I see.
Abigail: The Broncos should pay them for making the football season such an eagerly anticipated event.
ICN: Sooooo, what do you think about that flower on your head.
Abigail: It’s all right. I’m just hoping they don’t expect this kind of headwear into my teens. But it’s good for the big people. It makes them happy, gets them making funny noises. I’m hoping it parlays into candy once I get teeth.
ICN: Do you mind people getting all giddy, making crazy sounds and nibbling on you?
Abigail: It is a little strange. Especially when I’m supposed to look up to them as role models. But as LONG AS DADDY BRUSHES HIS TEETH than the closeup aren’t so bad.
ICN: Thank you for the time, Abigail.
Abigail: No probs. Before you go could you set me up with something to chew on?
ICN: Remote control? Cell phone?
Abigail: No…no that’s a lot of germs. How about the dog’s tail.
COMPANY OUTING TO ROCKIES GAME REPORTED AS SUCCESS
Joe “DeGarmo” DeGarmo, who gets discounts at Whole Foods because his girlfriend works there, said that it was a good game.
There were reports that the post-game entertainment was also a success, and that included going to a q4itha jdkl90 alkd322 fourteen six. Excuse us, we’re having some technical difficulties. Let’s try this again. Joe and crew ended up at aldjalkfja where they qtrq6 FIVE FIVE FIVE! Yah, keyboard has gone janky.
While we fix things, enjoy this picture of Sky’s knee and a beer.
He also took some splendid photos…
What does it mean?
Kelly “Cat Lady” Perry captured some serious baseball essence. Awesome.
Customer support manager Chris “lovechild of Gene Hackman and Bruce Willis” Steinbeck took this photo of himself and his wife, Betsy.
AND, IN A RELATED STORY, THE ROCKIES WON THE GAME
Interestingly enough, it was a homecoming for former Rockies manager Clint Hurdle. He now manages the Pirates during their successful 2013 season. What does that mean to his father? We’ll never know….
To wrap up this lengthy segment on the Rockies game, we should thank Kristen “Sparkly Fox” Pierson and Enid “Koalaty” Polovik for putting the whole thing together.
ASHLEY’S CORNER UNAVAILABLE AS THINGS ARE TOTES CRAY TODAY
Sean’s big project.
Why was that handshake so weird?
Who in the hell is Jake?
Keener, descendent of Sparta.